Saturday, January 22, 2005
More Tam Bram rants
This 'story' is coming straight from a down-on-his-luck Tam Bram guy, grappling with life in a South Indian city stuck in the Dark Ages, trying his damnedest to whip up some excitement in an otherwise dull and dreary existence :-)
Lets call this guy V. Now for the last couple of months, V has been claiming to anyone who will give him an ear that he's 'going around' with a colleague of his called A, a well bred typical Tam Bram gal. For starters, there are people who even dispute this claim since everyone but V is probably aware that a couple of movies / coffee get-togethers / long walks on the beach do not constitute 'going around' in a Tam Bram gal's dictionary...but let's leave that for a later discussion.
It appears there was this New Year bash in V's company and as part of the celebrations, Dumb Charades had been organised. Now V has never been one to miss even a single culturals from his college days and is a firm believer in the 'play-to-win' philosphy. As things would happen, lots were drawn randomly and he ended up being partnered with A and another friend of hers.(Non Tam Bram gal) Nothing could have suited V more and it seems they did quite well in the first three rounds. Bloody well, if you ask me, as he revealed that going into the final movies round, they were leading by a comfortable 50 odd seconds. As luck would have it, the second and third placed teams had cracked their movies in less than 5 secs so Vs team had been under a litle bit of pressure to get it right within the 60 secs limit to ensure that they finished on top. And here comes the best part of the story :-) Since A had been doing the miming all along, she went ahead and picked the chit. It seems she stared at it for a good 10 seconds after the clock had started and then stared at her teammates. Another 15 seconds passed by and by now it seems V had become desperate. He pleaded with her to not give up and try acting out something. She just remained silent and returned back claiming that she could not do it. And here comes the bestest part :-)) When V insisted on knowing what the movie was, pat came the reply "You don't expect me to act out lurid stuff like "Sex, Lies and Videotape", do you?" Hahahahahaha !! The day I first heard this story, I almost died of laughter. What was even more funny was that A and V hadn't talked to each other for a good 15 days after this incident and things have thawed down a little only now.
In this intervening period I have had to bear the brunt of V's diatribe against the whole community of Tam Bram women. Part of it was in the form of this mail that I am reproducing below. Tis a slight variation of the terribly cliched "What it means to have a Tamilian Girlfriend" but still a thought-provoking read. Some of it might sound plain ridikulous but if you are honest with yourself you'll find most of them to be true ;-)
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who can dance decently to anything but Indian film music and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't sneer at you when you use a spoon to eat curd rice and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who won't shriek when you tell her that you still watch porn and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who can fall in love and dare to make the first move and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't like Arvind Swamy and Madhavan and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't insist on eating only those chocolates with the green circle in their wrappers and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl whose connection to cricket goes beyond verbose Krishnamachari Srikanth or cute Rahul Dravid and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't introduce you to her family before or just after the first date and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Lets call this guy V. Now for the last couple of months, V has been claiming to anyone who will give him an ear that he's 'going around' with a colleague of his called A, a well bred typical Tam Bram gal. For starters, there are people who even dispute this claim since everyone but V is probably aware that a couple of movies / coffee get-togethers / long walks on the beach do not constitute 'going around' in a Tam Bram gal's dictionary...but let's leave that for a later discussion.
It appears there was this New Year bash in V's company and as part of the celebrations, Dumb Charades had been organised. Now V has never been one to miss even a single culturals from his college days and is a firm believer in the 'play-to-win' philosphy. As things would happen, lots were drawn randomly and he ended up being partnered with A and another friend of hers.(Non Tam Bram gal) Nothing could have suited V more and it seems they did quite well in the first three rounds. Bloody well, if you ask me, as he revealed that going into the final movies round, they were leading by a comfortable 50 odd seconds. As luck would have it, the second and third placed teams had cracked their movies in less than 5 secs so Vs team had been under a litle bit of pressure to get it right within the 60 secs limit to ensure that they finished on top. And here comes the best part of the story :-) Since A had been doing the miming all along, she went ahead and picked the chit. It seems she stared at it for a good 10 seconds after the clock had started and then stared at her teammates. Another 15 seconds passed by and by now it seems V had become desperate. He pleaded with her to not give up and try acting out something. She just remained silent and returned back claiming that she could not do it. And here comes the bestest part :-)) When V insisted on knowing what the movie was, pat came the reply "You don't expect me to act out lurid stuff like "Sex, Lies and Videotape", do you?" Hahahahahaha !! The day I first heard this story, I almost died of laughter. What was even more funny was that A and V hadn't talked to each other for a good 15 days after this incident and things have thawed down a little only now.
In this intervening period I have had to bear the brunt of V's diatribe against the whole community of Tam Bram women. Part of it was in the form of this mail that I am reproducing below. Tis a slight variation of the terribly cliched "What it means to have a Tamilian Girlfriend" but still a thought-provoking read. Some of it might sound plain ridikulous but if you are honest with yourself you'll find most of them to be true ;-)
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who can dance decently to anything but Indian film music and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't sneer at you when you use a spoon to eat curd rice and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who won't shriek when you tell her that you still watch porn and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who can fall in love and dare to make the first move and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't like Arvind Swamy and Madhavan and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't insist on eating only those chocolates with the green circle in their wrappers and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl whose connection to cricket goes beyond verbose Krishnamachari Srikanth or cute Rahul Dravid and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Show me a Tam Brahm girl who doesn't introduce you to her family before or just after the first date and I will stop ridiculing the tribe.
Friday, January 21, 2005
Ri and I
For both of you (my answers first)
1. Your partner's first crush: No idea / actress Amala (+0)
2. Your partner's favorite expression when referring to the current boss: she doesnt work / sibee's so cute (+5)
3. Your partner's first words to you: Hi / Hello (+5)
4. Your (both of you) favorite song: Pal Pal Dil Ke Paas (+5)
5. First compliment your partner paid you: You dance well, bte, do u like Govinda ? / Finally a gal who comes on time.. (-5, I thiink I compliemented her on her dressing sense)
6. Your partner's preferred honeymoon destination: Paris/ Italy (+5)
7. The one quality your partner most likes in you: honesty / maturity ?? (+5)
8. Your partner's favorite excuse when he/she is late: so far she has not been late / never late (+5)
9. The last fight you had with your partner: salsa classes / no major fight (-5, we definitely have fought)
10.Your (both of you) favorite hang-out spot: The Forum / nowhere in particular (-5)
For the men
11. The movie she wept most: No idea (0 - Rudaali)
12. Her favorite TV serial: Anything on Cartoon Network (+5)
13. Her brother's (if none, father) nickname for her: Ri (+5)
14. Her favorite lipstick shade: light pink (0 - no particular shade)
15. Her bedroom wall color: chocolate brown in Chennai (0 - light yellow)
16. Her favorite cartoon character: Jerry (+5)
For the women
11. His favorite TV commercial: hUTCH (0)
12. His favorite movie line: That one in Notting Hill (+5)
13. His sister's (if none, mother) nickname for him: Jupe (+5)
14. His favorite deo brand: AXE (+5)
15. His bedroom wallposter: A set of snaps (+5)
16. His favorite computer / video game: AOE ?? (0 - Dope Wars)
Total score - 15 + 15 + 20 = 50
1. Your partner's first crush: No idea / actress Amala (+0)
2. Your partner's favorite expression when referring to the current boss: she doesnt work / sibee's so cute (+5)
3. Your partner's first words to you: Hi / Hello (+5)
4. Your (both of you) favorite song: Pal Pal Dil Ke Paas (+5)
5. First compliment your partner paid you: You dance well, bte, do u like Govinda ? / Finally a gal who comes on time.. (-5, I thiink I compliemented her on her dressing sense)
6. Your partner's preferred honeymoon destination: Paris/ Italy (+5)
7. The one quality your partner most likes in you: honesty / maturity ?? (+5)
8. Your partner's favorite excuse when he/she is late: so far she has not been late / never late (+5)
9. The last fight you had with your partner: salsa classes / no major fight (-5, we definitely have fought)
10.Your (both of you) favorite hang-out spot: The Forum / nowhere in particular (-5)
For the men
11. The movie she wept most: No idea (0 - Rudaali)
12. Her favorite TV serial: Anything on Cartoon Network (+5)
13. Her brother's (if none, father) nickname for her: Ri (+5)
14. Her favorite lipstick shade: light pink (0 - no particular shade)
15. Her bedroom wall color: chocolate brown in Chennai (0 - light yellow)
16. Her favorite cartoon character: Jerry (+5)
For the women
11. His favorite TV commercial: hUTCH (0)
12. His favorite movie line: That one in Notting Hill (+5)
13. His sister's (if none, mother) nickname for him: Jupe (+5)
14. His favorite deo brand: AXE (+5)
15. His bedroom wallposter: A set of snaps (+5)
16. His favorite computer / video game: AOE ?? (0 - Dope Wars)
Total score - 15 + 15 + 20 = 50
Saturday, January 15, 2005
OK and I
For both of you (my answers first)
1. Your partner's first crush: the cine actor Karthik / his neigbourhood gal Abhi (+5)
2. Your partner's favorite expression when referring to the current boss: she doesnt work / sibee's a sweetheart (+5)
3. Your partner's first words to you: Hi or Hello..Tommy's told me about you.../ just a simple Hi (-5, it seems I said "Sowmya of Crossword fame ?")
4. Your (both of you) favorite song: Anjali Anjali - Duet / Anjali - Duet, Careless Whisper - GM (+5)
5. First compliment your partner paid you: With your height you must be having atleast half a dozen GFs (or sthg to that tune) / you r so smart for someone so pretty (-5, I dont remember making that compliment)
6. Your partner's preferred honeymoon destination: Mauritius/ Venice (-5, it seems Sowms prefers Thailand)
7. The one quality your partner most likes in you: plainspeak / enthusiasm (+5)
8. Your partner's favorite excuse when he/she is late: she never gives excuses / YM was not working (0 - traffic jam / had some work so cudnt log in)
9. The last fight you had with your partner: over me geting married / why LOTR is a classic (-5, LOTR was the last fight and not marriage, i was wrong)
10.Your (both of you) favorite hang-out spot: only one - Landmark / Landmark in Nungambakkam (+5)
For the men
11. The movie she wept most: Gandhi (+5)
12. Her favorite TV serial: Seinfeld (+5)
13. Her brother's (if none, father) nickname for her: No nicknames (0 - Nickname is Somy)
14. Her favorite lipstick shade: no lipstick (+5)
15. Her bedroom wall color: light green (+5 - green actually)
16. Her favorite cartoon character: Archie (+5)
For the women
11. His favorite TV commercial: Asian Paints (+5)
12. His favorite movie line: I'm just another gal...(+5)
13. His sister's (if none, mother) nickname for him: Babbu (+5)
14. His favorite deo brand: None (0 - actually its AXE)
15. His bedroom wallposter: a collage of photos (+5)
16. His favorite computer / video game: Ping Pong (0 - Dope Wars)
Total score - 5 + 25 + 20 = 50
1. Your partner's first crush: the cine actor Karthik / his neigbourhood gal Abhi (+5)
2. Your partner's favorite expression when referring to the current boss: she doesnt work / sibee's a sweetheart (+5)
3. Your partner's first words to you: Hi or Hello..Tommy's told me about you.../ just a simple Hi (-5, it seems I said "Sowmya of Crossword fame ?")
4. Your (both of you) favorite song: Anjali Anjali - Duet / Anjali - Duet, Careless Whisper - GM (+5)
5. First compliment your partner paid you: With your height you must be having atleast half a dozen GFs (or sthg to that tune) / you r so smart for someone so pretty (-5, I dont remember making that compliment)
6. Your partner's preferred honeymoon destination: Mauritius/ Venice (-5, it seems Sowms prefers Thailand)
7. The one quality your partner most likes in you: plainspeak / enthusiasm (+5)
8. Your partner's favorite excuse when he/she is late: she never gives excuses / YM was not working (0 - traffic jam / had some work so cudnt log in)
9. The last fight you had with your partner: over me geting married / why LOTR is a classic (-5, LOTR was the last fight and not marriage, i was wrong)
10.Your (both of you) favorite hang-out spot: only one - Landmark / Landmark in Nungambakkam (+5)
For the men
11. The movie she wept most: Gandhi (+5)
12. Her favorite TV serial: Seinfeld (+5)
13. Her brother's (if none, father) nickname for her: No nicknames (0 - Nickname is Somy)
14. Her favorite lipstick shade: no lipstick (+5)
15. Her bedroom wall color: light green (+5 - green actually)
16. Her favorite cartoon character: Archie (+5)
For the women
11. His favorite TV commercial: Asian Paints (+5)
12. His favorite movie line: I'm just another gal...(+5)
13. His sister's (if none, mother) nickname for him: Babbu (+5)
14. His favorite deo brand: None (0 - actually its AXE)
15. His bedroom wallposter: a collage of photos (+5)
16. His favorite computer / video game: Ping Pong (0 - Dope Wars)
Total score - 5 + 25 + 20 = 50
Friday, January 07, 2005
Koka Kola with Koundamani
Hullo...Hullo...Lights camera action sollungappa...
(turning to face the camera)
Ada echchooz me aah...This Star TV buying Vijay TV happening all programs becoming Tamglish ya..Indha..sorry.. This talk show is New Year special...
Audience c'mon yaaa clap....
(Loud clapping heard in the background..like laughter in those Zee English Serials)
Tang Yoo Tang Yoo
My style very simple..Ok...I calling 2 guests....2 famous people.... they come one by one..I ask questions like Thiruvilayadal style...same questions but people not copying answers...coz one person will keep locking...
What new in my show you asking...right ? right ? See, I know makkals mind..I am the best...Differentiating is this..at end of program all viewers sms who guest answer more funny...out of lucky draw one winner getting chance to come to Chennai...and kissing one of 2 guest live in my next Valentine day special program...This prize is sponsored by NOKIA - Connecting people - You understood what after I starting...
Before start of program, small commercial break...all viewers not going away...
(after break)
From back of green curtain putting and coming a red saree is the sexy...sorry... very very sexy Trishaaaaaaaaaa...
Audience c'mon yaaa clap....
(More loud clapping in the background)
Trisha, start panlaamango....Yahoooooooooooooooo...
Pirikka mudiyaathathu : Vajpayyum Kavidhayum
Pirikka koodathathu : Bajjiyum Vengayamum
Saernthaey iruppathu : Oorga and ...sorry... next question
Saeraamal iruppathu : Oil and water ya
Solla koodaathathu : Thiruttu VCD paaklamaa ?
Solla koodiyathu : I am a Complan girl
Paarka koodaathathu : Kuliyal scene video
Paarthu rasippathu : Gilli
Paatukku : Namma Subbu
Veenaikku : Kunnakudi Vaidyanathan (Hullo Madam, adhukku per Violin)Sollukku : Subramaniam Swamy
'Vill'ukku : Birla (Bayangara thamaasa pesreengo)
Aasaikku : Ajit Kumar
Arivukku : Abdul Kalam (Clapping Clapping)
POTAvukku : Porur Pakkiri
Photovukku : Kareena Kapoor
Thundukku : Sillarai
Gundukku : Shakeela
Lollukku : Koundamani
Jollukku : (turning to face the camera) Tamil Makkal
Shabaash Shabaash, rombave nalla badhil sonneengo...Now second guest...
From back of red curtain putting and coming a blue jeans is the perazhagan...Lakshmipathy Balaji....
Balaji, start panlaamango....Yahoooooooooooooooo...
Pirikka mudiyaathathu : Paalum Pazhamum
Pirikka koodathathu : Love Birds
Saernthaey iruppathu : Indian cricket team
Saeraamal iruppathu : Tamil Nadigar Sangam
Solla koodaathathu : Pakistan Hai Hai
Solla koodiyathu : Aatha Parthiv Paasayittaan
Paarka koodaathathu : Baywatch
Paarthu rasippathu : Shaz and Waz show :)
Paatukku : Guru kiran (Kannada va..yaar Kumble sollikuduthaara ?)Veenaikku : Ravi kiran
Sollukku : Arun Jaitley
Villukku : Arun Govil (Yevan avan??)
Aasaikku : NaanArivukku : Neenga
POTAvukku : VaiKo
Photovukku : KoVai (Sarala ??)
Thundukku : Kalaignar
Gundukku : Naan sollamaatten pa :-p
Lollukku : Lalloo
Jollukku : Jothika
Bhale Bhale super super...Kalakitteenga ponga...
Audience, 5 minutes la send sms... results after this short commercial break...
(After the break)
Computer, how many sms came...244...Super.... who is more funny....101 votes to Trisha....140 votes to Balaji...ada, enakku 3 votes...
Computer, choose today's lucky winner...choose girl please....winner is.....
(turning to face the camera)
Ada echchooz me aah...This Star TV buying Vijay TV happening all programs becoming Tamglish ya..Indha..sorry.. This talk show is New Year special...
Audience c'mon yaaa clap....
(Loud clapping heard in the background..like laughter in those Zee English Serials)
Tang Yoo Tang Yoo
My style very simple..Ok...I calling 2 guests....2 famous people.... they come one by one..I ask questions like Thiruvilayadal style...same questions but people not copying answers...coz one person will keep locking...
What new in my show you asking...right ? right ? See, I know makkals mind..I am the best...Differentiating is this..at end of program all viewers sms who guest answer more funny...out of lucky draw one winner getting chance to come to Chennai...and kissing one of 2 guest live in my next Valentine day special program...This prize is sponsored by NOKIA - Connecting people - You understood what after I starting...
Before start of program, small commercial break...all viewers not going away...
(after break)
From back of green curtain putting and coming a red saree is the sexy...sorry... very very sexy Trishaaaaaaaaaa...
Audience c'mon yaaa clap....
(More loud clapping in the background)
Trisha, start panlaamango....Yahoooooooooooooooo...
Pirikka mudiyaathathu : Vajpayyum Kavidhayum
Pirikka koodathathu : Bajjiyum Vengayamum
Saernthaey iruppathu : Oorga and ...sorry... next question
Saeraamal iruppathu : Oil and water ya
Solla koodaathathu : Thiruttu VCD paaklamaa ?
Solla koodiyathu : I am a Complan girl
Paarka koodaathathu : Kuliyal scene video
Paarthu rasippathu : Gilli
Paatukku : Namma Subbu
Veenaikku : Kunnakudi Vaidyanathan (Hullo Madam, adhukku per Violin)Sollukku : Subramaniam Swamy
'Vill'ukku : Birla (Bayangara thamaasa pesreengo)
Aasaikku : Ajit Kumar
Arivukku : Abdul Kalam (Clapping Clapping)
POTAvukku : Porur Pakkiri
Photovukku : Kareena Kapoor
Thundukku : Sillarai
Gundukku : Shakeela
Lollukku : Koundamani
Jollukku : (turning to face the camera) Tamil Makkal
Shabaash Shabaash, rombave nalla badhil sonneengo...Now second guest...
From back of red curtain putting and coming a blue jeans is the perazhagan...Lakshmipathy Balaji....
Balaji, start panlaamango....Yahoooooooooooooooo...
Pirikka mudiyaathathu : Paalum Pazhamum
Pirikka koodathathu : Love Birds
Saernthaey iruppathu : Indian cricket team
Saeraamal iruppathu : Tamil Nadigar Sangam
Solla koodaathathu : Pakistan Hai Hai
Solla koodiyathu : Aatha Parthiv Paasayittaan
Paarka koodaathathu : Baywatch
Paarthu rasippathu : Shaz and Waz show :)
Paatukku : Guru kiran (Kannada va..yaar Kumble sollikuduthaara ?)Veenaikku : Ravi kiran
Sollukku : Arun Jaitley
Villukku : Arun Govil (Yevan avan??)
Aasaikku : NaanArivukku : Neenga
POTAvukku : VaiKo
Photovukku : KoVai (Sarala ??)
Thundukku : Kalaignar
Gundukku : Naan sollamaatten pa :-p
Lollukku : Lalloo
Jollukku : Jothika
Bhale Bhale super super...Kalakitteenga ponga...
Audience, 5 minutes la send sms... results after this short commercial break...
(After the break)
Computer, how many sms came...244...Super.... who is more funny....101 votes to Trisha....140 votes to Balaji...ada, enakku 3 votes...
Computer, choose today's lucky winner...choose girl please....winner is.....
Sunday, January 02, 2005
SOS
Karthik, Vikram and Fenon have finally found an NGO that seems to be working at Cuddalore and Nagapattinam and needs volenteers for its grass roots Tsunami relief work. In case you know of any friends who wanna pitch in, pls contact me asap.
Thanks again for the material and money that you folks and your friends generously poured in.
Wishing you all a very peaceful and prosperous New Year.
Thanks again for the material and money that you folks and your friends generously poured in.
Wishing you all a very peaceful and prosperous New Year.
